mirth-less

It was Holi again and the usual revelry took place. Only this time after eating and drinking too much I fell into an abyss of sleep. Somehow things are not the same anymore. I cannot do without so many things. My sleep, the right food. I abuse any of it and the results are not too pretty.

I live on a plane that seems so removed. I no longer find pleasure in all that I used to. Sometimes the things that excite my friends piss me off or I find them silly. Some time back close friends visited with a one year old kid. Very smart baby. Can talk in single syllable which so thrills the parents. The mother, my close friend says, "Have you noticed, how well behaved she is. She doesn't fling sofa cushions on the floor like other kids."

"Yes, yes, I noticed that." I assured just in time to hold out my palm for the mobile phone the little one was smashing on my center table. And silently I wonder how my bedsheets, sofas, doors and windows, have all got smeared with tiny handprints of melted chocolate. While I give up and smile, the parents just run around with the camera clicking silly shots of a messy with chocolate kid.

Yes, these are the things a lot of my friends are occupied with nowaday. Other than whipping out a boob even in public whenever a baby protests and cries for it.

And then what about the jokes that the world finds so funny they laugh like hyenas while I watch whose mouth is bigger and whose teeth can start scraping coconuts. The other day, we had a spiritual lecture. A serious discussion where we were asked not to hold back, told to sit without folding arms in front, to let go and laugh when we felt like it. And some did exactly that. Whatever was said, they found it funny and rolled over in mirth. And I started getting irritated with all the laughing.

And on Holi, I watched my neighbour rub a handful of colour all over her friend's husband's face and giggle away. They both laughed really loud and I watched in disgust from my 8th floor balcony. I didn't find it funny again.